I Had an Elective C-section & I Am Not Ashamed About It.

Every pregnant woman has surely heard n number of times that how a normal delivery is better than C-section and how she must do this and do that to facilitate the normal delivery. It was no different for me.

I was in the 8th month of pregnancy when my gynac hinted that she would prefer a c-section in my case. No there were no complications then but just that ours was a precious baby conceived through ivf. People back home were not happy with the decision but I was neutral. Everyday I was being advised that I must put my foot down and insist on a normal delivery. I was also told that the doctor was manipulating me in the name of ivf pregnancy. I did try a couple of times to talk to the doctor and check if we can wait for the normal delivery but in vain. The doctor said that just out of precaution, they do not wait for normal delivery to happen in case of ivf conceptions.

Finally the time came when we had to make the final decision. I readily gave in for a planned C-Section delivery because I had thought over the matter for two whole weeks and had come to the conclusion that at least in my case, C-section was a better and safe option. I will tell you why.

I readup lot of stories of normal deliveries. We always think that normal delivery is the best and safe from the health perspective of both, the mom and the child. But I came across many cases where the mothers regretted having chosen normal delivery because they encountered an emergency situation while in labour.

I came across many cases where mothers paid a huge price for normal delivery. Like, being unable to push till the end and and baby facing distress inside the womb. Many cases unfortunately also turned out to impact the baby physically, like an arm was damaged and even worst something as simple as shooting bp during labour made the child autistic. These are not stories but live examples in the form of friends and relatives. We often think that such things happen to others until it happens to ourself, but I was not ready to take a chance.

I was not ready to experiment in any way, because we had conceived after 8 yrs of marriage and after spending lakhs of rupees, loosing two baby in the womb twice and shedding countless tears and spending numerous sleepless nights. There was too much to lose if something was to go wrong. I couldnt imagine having come this far and going home empty handed – a fear that all ivf mothers have in the deepest corner of their heart. Secondly my body may not have been able to support the normal delivery because I had a condition with uterus (though it was cured by then). Aditionally, all the hormonal medicines and countless injections of ivf procedure had made my body weak. Another reason was that ivf babies are observed to be weaker than normally conceived babies, hence I didnt want my baby to utilise all his strength to come out in this world and then fight for life with certain health conditions.

On the other hand, the only flip side of a C-section was the difficult recovery, some marks that would stay on my abdomen forever and an increased cost of the surgery. At least, my baby was going to be safe! So, I was very clear that I would go for C-section only.

I entered 37th week of pregnancy and we were scheduled for a C-section as soon as the week ended. However, I started feeling extremely uneasy 4 days before. I was having a difficulty to breath and could not feel my baby’s movements actively. We rushed to the hospital and a few tests were performed. It showed that the baby had a looped the umbilical cord around the neck. Also, instead of descending, the baby had moved upwards so much so that his legs were pushing into my chest. So each time he tried to move I would face a bout of breathlessness. The technician said that it is not an emergency yet but I must discuss the reports with my gynac to check whether we need a C-section any time soon. She obviously was not aware that I was scheduled for one in a few days.

My gynac told me to take as much rest as possible in order to complete 37 weeks without needing to deliver before. And by God’s grace, I somehow pulled through. Nobody can imagine my fear and insecurity in those 4 days when I felt breathless and no movements of the baby for a longer than usual time.

Eventually the day arrived and I was rushed to the OT. Since a sonography was performed just 4 days ago, another sonography was not performed before the surgery. The baby’s heartbeats were monitored every two hours though. I couldnt wait any longer to get done with the delivery and I laid calmly on the operation table as my gynac made an incision on my abdomen. My baby was out in 15 mins. You can hear and talk to the doctors at the time of delivery because anesthesia works only on the lower part of the body and I clearly remember doctor using suction and forceps to pull my baby out because he was ascended way higher than normal. Later, the doctor said that with this position and the loop around neck normal delivery may not have been possible even in the case of a normal conception, let alone the ivf conception.

Thus, in the eyes of society I fell prey to the doctor’s gimmicks of tricking me into C-section to make money. For some, I was a coward who feared a normal delivery and for others I just did not have enough tenacity to bear the labour pain. I don’t care what others have to think. I am glad that I had a planned C-section and I am not ashamed about it. My baby was and is far more important to me than to worry how much extra bucks the doctor was making or how ugly my abdomen will look with those stitches from the surgery.

This is a part of #LetsBlogwithPri, a Blog Train hosted by Prisha Lalwani, Author at Mummasaurus.

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I wholeheartedly thank Shruti Mirchandani, my fellow blogger, for introducing me in her blog about how to handle a cranky baby. Also, I would like to introduce Mariyum. Do read her blog on here

5 Steps To Plan A Budgeted Birthday Party And Still Have Fun

Birthdays are a special occasion and it is very exciting to plan parties, especially for the kinds. Most of the parents go over board and spend a fortune on such parties. But do you know we can plan a budgeted birthday party for our kids and still have fun? Today, there is a trend of extravagance, be it weddings, birthday celebrations or any other occasion, but the question is whether we really need so much of pomp show for each of the event?

I am a big fan of simple parties, especially birthday parties. Call me old fashioned, but even today I like how birthdays were celebrated when we were kids. A bunch of friends, simple cake, some wafers, a glass of Rasna and that’s it. The gifts received by the birthday girl/boy were very minimalist in value yet gave great happiness. And return gifts were even more minimal, perhaps just a pencil or something. But things have changed today. It seems, there is always a competition about who celebrates kids birthday in a more grand way and the charm of simplicity is replaced by glamour.
So, in this world of best of the best, how can you arrange simple birthday parties and yet have fun? 

1. Venue: Home parties are the best. Saves a huge amount of money we pay as rentals. If the house is not big enough to accommodate the guests, check if you can use common areas like club house or terrace  or open garden of your residential complex. 

2. Decoration: DIYs are the best bet. Involve your kids in DIY decorations like blowing balloons, rainbow strips, birthday hanging etc. Many tutorial videos are available on youtube for the same. If it is not feasible to DIY, you can procure the decoration material at dirt cheap rates from local markets like Crowford Market in Mumbai, Municipal markets in every locality. You just need to step out and find the right shops. Often, these materials are priced higher on shopping portals and websites.

3. Limited Food spread: Considering the fact that kids are mostly picky eaters and never finish the full plate of food, limit the food spread to only kids friendly items and restrict the number to maximum 3 snacks, accompanied by cake and a drink. Monginis, Merwans and other cake shops provide very good options for snack boxes starting from Rs40. My favorite combo is from Monginis, A veg wrap, 2 cookies, a packet of potato shells, cake slice and frooti. This box costed me 40 Rs. The selction would depend really on the age group of kids. If the kids are older, you may want to add more snacks to the box. This is a very economical and zero – wastage way to manage food at home birthday parties.

4. Return Gifts: I am a big advocate of useful gifts. My all time favorite and budget friendly and of course very useful are the school stationery items. You can do a lot of mix and match with these and make great hampers yourself. Kids often lose these items or finish them very fast since these are the most used items everyday hence, getting them as return gifts are always welcome. You can also consider other not so expensive items like fancy cloth bags, a plant or a sapling etc. You can check the wholeseller shops for procuring these at a rate lesser than MRP.

5. Birthday Cake: Well, that’s the most expensive part of the birthday party. These days we get such a great variety of cakes that it is very difficult to make a choice. Also, the mainstream commercial cakes are very expensive. The best way is to bake a cake yourself or get it from a home baker. Home bakers give you a great taste and quality at a rate much lesser than a branded cake shop. Check out google for home bakers available near your area and you shall be amazed to see the art and love these guys put in to make your birthday cakes special.
So what are you waiting for? Get set go! Go find out some wholesellers in your locality so that you can plan return gifts in advance. Find some home bakers and take your time to check their work. Try your hand at some DIY decorations. The joy that you will receive from doing and planning these things on your own shall be a lot more rather than an even management company doing it. Also, kids will always remember your efforts to make their day special. Go ahead and try a budgetd party for a change and see how do you enjoy that.

How do you like to celebrate birthdays of your children? How do you arrange parties for them. Do share your experiences in the comments section.

If you like my tips, do share it with your friends.

This post was published as a part of blogtrain hosted by Prisha Lalwani, the author at Mummasaurus

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I would like to thank Shruti Mulchandani for introducing me in this train. You can read her contribution here

I would also like to introduce Kanika. Do read her contribution here

5 “No Medicine” Ways To Handle Colic in Infants

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While Colic is the most common occurrence in infants, it the the worst nightmare for a new mother. It is extremely overwhelming to manage an infant suffering from colic because the baby is extremely cranky, crying out loud and nothing seems to soothe him/her, and all this when the new mother is still healing, perhaps still struggling to cope up with the basic body functions of her own. After all childbirth is the the birth of a mother too! She is also going through a challenging situation of healing self plus nurturing a new life.

So how can we handle such situations? Newborns are extremely tender and while they are just learning to settle down outside the comfort of mother’s womb, there are many things that will affect them very easily and colic is one of those. My first encounter with colic was on day 4 when we were still in the hospital. That was the only night when my husband had stayed with me because both the grand moms deserved a good night sleep after tending to me for 3 days and 3 nights and baby Aarnav chose to scare us that very night. He was relentlessly crying and we had no clue what was happening. Doctor said it was colic and did give some medicine drops but that didnt seem to bring any relief to this little soul. We had to constantly rock him or just sway him a little while taking rounds of the hospital lobby. I was on the verge of fainting considering a sever ache in the lower body (thanks to c section), continuous breast feeding and no rest at all. But that was the first and the last time Colic must have taken the best of us. There after, with the help of my mom and mom-in-law and their rich experience in childcare, i learnt the best way to deal with Colic. What is that way, you may ask? The best way is to be proactive. Learning to understand the signs and warnings that baby gives helps in a great way to stop the colic affecting the baby in a sever way.
The signs that baby is restless because of colic is when the baby in inconsolably crying for a long time with clenched fists or when the baby’s tummy feels hard around the navel. Some times, the baby will give more obvious signs like passing wind.

You may want to know the tips and tricks I learnt from my mom and mom-in-law for handling Colic:

  1. Watch what you eat: If you are a breastfeeding mom it is very essential to be watchful of the food you eat because that is directly going to impact the baby. veggies like potatoes, cabbage, simla mirch, cauliflower are a strict no no. Anything that is heavy for you to digest is super heavy to digest for the baby, so you may want to avoid over intake of too dense and raw food.
  2. Tummy massage: I used to do this daily and it helped Aarnav in a great way. If the baby is colicky, put warm coconut oil in and around the navel of the baby and start massaging softly with your thumb in circular motion around the navel. You should be able to judge how much pressure you must put (mother’s instincts 🙂 ) and then gradually start giving massage strokes downwards, i.e from the navel towards pelvic region. Aarnav used to pass a lot of wind with this technique and used to feel relaxed so this became a mandate for us.
  3. Ajawin Potli Sek: Warm up a pan and toss some ajwain in it. Then wrap it in a soft mulmul cloth and tie it lie a potli. Gently warm up the baby’s stomach with this potli. I used two potlis at a time. When the first one was being used on Aarnav’s tummy, the second one would be sitting on the pan warming itself. This saves lot if time. This is a very effective method.
  4. Tummy Time & Postures: I am sure that all the doctors demonstrate how to give tummy time to the infants and also there are lot of videos available on youtube. So just be confident and give your baby a tummy time. Make it a daily practice starting from a few seconds to few minutes as the baby grows older and to the extent of his/her comfort. I used to get scared to do this, so I didn’t do it as often but I gather from fellow moms that it is very very effective. There are various other postures in which you can rest your baby in order to lessen the impact of colic. Check with your doctor about the angle in which you can keep the baby inclined in a baby carrier to soothe him from colic. Wear your baby or swaddle him/her.
  5. Exercise: Now this was the fun part of colic which Aarnav and I used to enjoy the most. Just lay down the baby on his/her back and lift his/her feet fold them gently and press against the baby’s tummy. You may also want to try and touch it to his/her forehead. Do it slowly and gently. 4 to 5 repetitions are enough in a new born. Aarnav used to show quick results with this technique, again by passing wind 🙂

And last but the most important – Do no feel frustrated for not being able to manage the baby well. Do no blame yourself for the colic (unless you ate something that is resulting in to colic). You are a mom only as old as your baby is, so chill, we all are learning. No mom is a bad mom! And all great moms are those who were once very novice like us but learnt from the experience. Cheers!

Hope you like this information. Do share my blog with fellow moms if you find this useful

This is a part of #LetsBlogwithPri, a Blog Train hosted by Prisha Lalwani, Author at Mummasaurus. I wholeheartedly thank Shruti Mirchandani, my fellow blogger, for introducing me in her blog about how to handle a cranky baby. Also, I would like to introduce Mariyum. Do read her blog on here

Tihs post is a part of <a href="http://Hosted By :Prisha LalwaniMummasaurus.comIG: @mummasaurus1FB: /mummasaurus1“>http://<img class=”” src=”http://www.mummasaurus.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/LetsBlogWithPri.png&#8221; width=”387″ height=”388″ /><b>Hosted By :Prisha Lalwani<a href=”http://www.mummasaurus.com/”>Mummasaurus.com</a>IG: <a href=”http://www.instagram.com/mummasaurus1″>@mummasaurus1</a>FB: <a href=”http://www.facebook.com/mummasaurus1″>/mummasaurus1</a></b&gt;

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